


Mailbox 1973-75

by pearl_o



Category: X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Epistolary, M/M, Post-Movie(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-31
Updated: 2014-05-31
Packaged: 2018-01-27 17:03:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1718048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearl_o/pseuds/pearl_o
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes - not very often - Charles will receive a piece of mail, no signature and no return address.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mailbox 1973-75

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tumblr. Spoilers for both movies.

Do you sleep, Charles?

Your powers are back now, obviously, so you must have woken up and realized that the bargain you had made was a bad one. I cannot tell you how maddening it was to see you that way, to realize you had forced yourself into something you were never meant to be. That you had allowed yourself to become lesser, weaker, that you had given up one of the things - _the_ thing - that makes you who you are.

I don't know what changed your mind, but I am glad you came to your senses, my friend.

Still, I wonder: do you sleep?

It is nearly three in the morning. I will not tell you the city where I am now, and indeed I doubt you want the burden of the knowledge - but it is hot here even in these small hours, and crowded, and beyond the curtains of my room there is light and noise. It is a fine place to disappear, to bide my time until I can figure out how to continue my struggle for our kind.

And yet.

Do you remember those nights together on the road, Charles? Or did you burn them away, along with what you once proclaimed to feel for me? I remember them. A brief handful of days, it seems now, when we were united together, working together for our mutant brothers and sisters.

I've not slept like that before or since. You told me, then, that you would keep the nightmares away. I suppose it wasn't a lie; you never included a time frame. It was only ever a matter of time before you would see me in the light you do now. Likely you won't even read this letter, but throw it away unopened instead.

Still, I find myself writing anyway. I do miss you, Charles. I don't believe I ever said so.

And I hope your sleep is more peaceful than my own.

* * *

I know what they are saying about me in the newspaper today. It isn't true, though I don't suppose that matters. They can say whatever they want about me, for they are in power and want nothing more than to crush me - crush us - and they will do it however they can. Slandering my name is the least of it.

Still. I want you to know. It isn't true.

* * *

A single, beautifully made, crystal chess pawn.

* * *

A used copy of _The Once and Future King_ , a book Charles already owns. The jacket is tattered; when Charles looks through it more closely, there are multiple passages underlined lightly in pencil, and annotations in tiny familiar script. There is a small piece of papers, perhaps a receipt, tucked between two pages, in a language Charles believes to be Chinese.

* * *

A delicate metal horse, the size of Charles's thumb.

* * *

Sometimes I think you will never be out of my head, Charles. Even after all these years, even after how clear you've made it you would find no longer find anything but disgust within - still I find there's a part of you left behind here. Too incomplete for comfort, during those days alone in my confinement, but enough for me to feel your judgment even now.

I argue with you; I explain my reasons. They are never enough to convince you.

The man today - if I had let him go, he would have hurt so many more mutant children. I did what was necessary. I stand by my actions, just as I always have. I do not regret the things I have done.

So why, then, do I still feel the weight of your disappointment, your disapproval? Why do I still search for the words to convince you that your place should always have been by my side?

I never claimed to be a good man. That was your folly, not mine.

* * *

A plain postcard, completely blank except for the address, the date and the simple message: _Happy birthday_.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Mailbox 1973 - 1975 (The Letters to Nowhere Remix)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2155668) by [pocky_slash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pocky_slash/pseuds/pocky_slash)




End file.
